It's been 3 years since we left Deutschland for good and I admit that all these while, my obsession of the life I once had there never quiet leave me.
It has always been in me that sometimes I forgot that there are far other better things in life that I should cherish.
If I were still in DE, and had to go through all these, I would definitely be more devastated because I wouldn't have my whole big family with me!
I just realized, how lucky I am to still have my mom, my husband and all family members regardless whether their just in laws or biologically related. Their support and comforting words always made me stronger.

Lesson number three:
Be grateful with what we have even when we are down with a huge test.

***********

The biopsy results was ready on wednesday, 16th of November 2016.
Together, me and hubby went to the hospital again to meet the doctor.
Like I mentioned before, I had not even felt the slightest fear nor worry...
I was fully prepared for any possibilities...
And.....
Alhamdulillah, the results turned out to be a huge relief....
The tumor was noncancerous however it was precancerous.
The doctor said, it should be removed as soon as possible. She referred me to the general surgeon there at the same hospital.
We met the surgeon, had a long discussion, and set the date for the surgery. About two weeks away..
Unfortunately, the surgeon was only capable of doing an open surgery while me and hubby had something else in mind. We wanted to go for laparoscopic surgery (can google that up if don't already know).
We planned to seek for a second opinion from our doctor in Pekan.
We headed back to our home in Pekan later that evening. The next important thing we all looked forward to:
Afeef's UPSR result was going to be out the next day...

Eventhough I was down with a low grade fever since the day I was discharged from the hospital, and felt a bit weak on the day when UPSR result was out, I still made it to school! I wanted to be there for Afeef, regardless of the result.
Hubby took some times off work too to join us :)

I told Afeef many times even before UPSR began, that whatever his UPSR result would be, he would always be a straight A's person to me :)

That was because of all the efforts he had put in, and most importantly, how he had spent time helping his friends who were weak in certain subjects.
His willingness to help others always touched my heart to the deepest :)
I learned from Afeef that 6As wasn't what we were after. There're far other better things to cherish in Afeef's first journey to a huge exam. If he gets 6As, it's a bonus, but what he had learnt along the way, was all that matter.

We gathered outside the school hall together with all other parents, and eventually, the result was ready.
Afeef got 3A3B!!
Alhamdulillah, so proud of him.
And so, we celebrated at a nearby restaurant. It was one of the greatest moment after being sick for a while.

I was down with a fever again that night, and I could not do much except lying down and watched my kids prepared their school uniforms themselves. They ironed and hanged their uniforms neatly, they folded their clothes and arranged them, and the next morning, when hubby was still at the mosque for Subuh prayer, they even prepared their own breakfast huhu....

How sad was I, but on the bright side, they did everything themselves!!
Isn't that great?

********

Friday morning the next day, I felt too weak to make it to the clinic, but I needed to consult the doctor regarding this surgery I'm gonna have. It mattered to hubby that we seek the best treatment that we could. As for me, I felt almost like giving up, I felt like I didn't want to seek anyone's opinion anymore, just let it be... if an open surgery was what I need, so be it...

Hubby took me to the clinic anyway, and how grateful I was for that...
One of the doctor's friend happened to be a colorectal surgeon, and guess what??
Not only that he's a colorectal surgeon, but also he'd done many laparoscopic surgery in the past, oh just what we had been looking for!!
I was so glad...
Our doctor in Pekan even gave the surgeon a call and informed him of our situation, and he even made a referral letter, it was great, it wouldn't have been that easy if it wasn't for Allah's help :')

We headed back to KL that evening, it was Friday,18th of November.
We planned to meet the surgeon on Wednesday the following week...

********
Wednesday came without me realizing it...
There we were, again just me and hubby at Darul Ehsan Medical Centre Shah Alam to meet the surgeon for the first time.
He was a quite convincing kind of a person, calm, and very positive. Everything he told us made me feel more relaxed and confident to go through this surgery.
So he set the date for the surgery, just about one week away...
Because the tumor was precancerous, so we shouldn't delay, that's what the doctor said...
It was perfect for me as it was set on the first week of the year end school holiday.
I felt relief, at least I didn't have to worry about the kids and school.

We headed back to our home in Pekan that evening, because of this surgery thing, I forgot to make sure the date for Award giving ceremony for Afeef and Fatini. Too bad... we missed it...
For the first time since my kids started schooling, this award thing didn't really matter anymore...

********

The remaining days before the surgery, I spent them making a lot of doa and solat hajat, I was nervous...
But I wasn't scared....

Looking back, how Allah had arranged everything so perfectly for me, masyaAllah....
I couldn't expressed enough gratitude to Allah for there are no words to describe how grateful I was...

"If you were to count the favors of Allah, you will never be able to count them; surely Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.."
(An-Nahl: 18)

"Seek help through patience and prayer. Certainly, Allah is with those who are patient..." (Al-Baqarah: 153)
:') :') :')