It's been 10 years!

Assalamualaikum wbt...

Happy anniversary to hubby and me... 

Been too busy for the past few weeks, I've almost forgotten this important date!

It's been 10 years, today is our tenth anniversary, we went out celebrating a little achievement Afeef had done in school, but I totally forgot that it's our anniversary!!! .... Silly me, I guess i've lost track of time.. Haaaaiiihhh... Hehe

Hey, don't blame me, I'm a busy house wife :P

Nevertheless, it is our anniversary, alhamdulillah, ten years of marriage, with ups and downs that only made us mature and stronger...

And, it is our first anniversary in Malaysia after 4 years....

In our new Home... :)

May Allah give us happiness and guide us through fid dunya wal akhirah ;)

A Place, I once called... HOME...

Assalamualaikum wbt...

So, it's been 3 weeks....? 

Really??

Felt like years..... Ahah... Time is too slow for those who wait..... 

Errrr..  what am I waiting for?? 

I don't know.... 
My mind keep spiraling around the same thing everyday;

Our first day in Deutschland, Afeef's first day at kindergarten, Afeef's first day at school, Fatini's first day at kindergarten, the route I used to take to fetch Afeef from school during his first few months schooling, the route I used to take fetching Fatini from Kindergarten, the beautiful views that often took my breath away.... Our home there... I miss the smell of the cool air, I miss to see the beautiful light casted by the sun particularly during Spring and Autumn when the sun's slanting at an angle casting a very very beautiful light that makes the view so much like in a fantasy land... 

I miss to watch sunsets from our window...

I miss the library where I used to take the kids after school.. I miss the coffee there, the kind and friendly people, tadarus friends, the shops, the cleanliness, the freedom form worrying... I miss to walk alone and feel safe.. I miss to sit by the window, sip my hot coffee, watch people go by for their daily routine, and I miss the tranquility I've always felt there.... Yes... That's it... Tranquility....

That tranquility I used to feel is no longer with me....  replaced by something else... Something that makes me feel trapped, suffocated.... Haaiiiiihhhh... Mmmmmm... I still can't let it go huh? Seemed like it.

Hubby said, "Your life began there.. That's why you miss Deutschland so much..."

Yess it's true.. My life began there... 

So much I've learnt in Deutschland too... 

Nevertheless, no matter how empty my heart feels sometimes, I remain composed infront of the kids, so that they too will not long for the life we've once had, let it just be the most beautiful memories that will remain intact in our hearts. 

Life has to go on...

I'm not going to waste my time reminisce about the past, instead I will make our life here as meaningful as it once was. Though sometimes I couldn't help myself hehe... It became a routine now that I must click to see the weather in Kaiserslautern Germany everyday, and stare into space once in a while thinking about that beautiful feelings and times we had there, and browse through old photos during our early months there....

Only time will heal.... 

On the positive sides, a lot of things have fallen neatly into places... 

Like, we've got a car, a home within the first week in Malaysia with Afeef's school just a few steps away, and what's more? 

Afeef is adapting well with the new environment in school, and picking up well with all the subjects too. And he already has some friends. And he seemed happy too.. Alhamdulillah..

Fatini just started kindergarten 3 days ago, and surprisingly she likes her new kindergarten very much, and she got along well with everyone there.... Though the kindergarten is not as nice as the one she went to in DE, but she likes it!! What else should I want?? The kid's happiness is my priority and that is all that matters to me ;)

I used to say this before, "If Allah wants us to be happy, we will be happy, no matter where we live our life.." 

I strongly believe in this, this is infact my strength nowadays, because I know, sometimes the only way for us to achive something or to be happy with our life, is to first go through what we despise and be patient with it. I'm certain, as long as I put my trust in Allah, there's something more for me to learn here, something more meaningful awaits me..... What I have in Deutschland was just some part of it, what I'm gonna have in Malaysia is the rest of it... InsyaAllah...

Some photos from our last day in DE:

The last night in our Home there... :')

We were waiting for Lily and Victor, they came and visit us that last night before the day our flight was due to depart. 

Meeting them for the last time broke my heart...

They gave us gifts and a card which they insisted we read it once we're in Malaysia ;)

And we gave them a book full of printed photos of our times together.

I thought the book was nothing, but Lily cried the moment she finished looking through all the photos. 

Then she hugged me tightly..

She's the first and only person who cried...

Not only for the fact that we're leaving, but for all the moments we've had and memories we've created together.. :')

This photo was taken on the day our flight was due to depart...

This was the view from our balcony at the back.

This was morning... a very beautiful and bright morning... 

A warm winter I would call it :)

The empty house...

As empty as my heart... :'(

The empty bathroom....

The kitchen window where I used to sit by and sipped my coffee...

My office... :)

Used to be my office hehe...

The staircase leading to our doorstep from the main door...

Our doorbell...

The last pic I took in front of the house before we got on the car and head to the airport...

This WAS our home...

This was my last view of the Museum...

The view I've always loved...

And I'll never have it again...

And I can never gaze at it again, except in photos... and of course in my memories :')

~~Sometimes, we never know the true value of a moment until it becomes a memory~~

Kaiserslautern Germany....

A place, I once called... Home...

Will always be in a wonderful way in my Memory lane..

Always always... :')

6 More days.....

6 more days...

6 more days, and I'm gonna have to put all these behind...

6 more days, and I'm gonna have to let go...

6 more days, and I'm gonna have to start a new life... 

A new beginning... 

But...

It feels so...... Wrong...

A few months ago, I was super excited to leave..

The idea alone made me feel so alive.

But, as we are nearing the day, the emptier my heart feels...

As empty as the house as more and more stuffs being packed in a box or thrown away..

The more I watched Afeef so close to tears whenever he talked about how sad he is to leave his best friends, the more my heart sinked.. There were times, when sadness was too overwhelming that I felt my throat constrict, and my chest felt heavy that I felt like as if I'm choking.. 

Haaaiiiihhh... Can you believe this??

Yeah yeah... That's me... I became extremely emotional these days..

It is way past midnight  now, and midnight is the time where sadness reach its peak... Oh so much memories playing in my head over and over again.... 

 I found it hard to sleep lately, coz I hate waking up in the morning and know that I have less days in Deutschland. 

I've been waiting to watch the last snow fall, but seemed like there'll be no snow fall this year.. 

Aha.... Tak de rezeki...

I know, I'll miss Deutschland terribly...

I know only time will heal....

Only time will heal.... 

Till later, Assalamualaikum wbt... 

 :')

The Kampung Boy...

Assalamualaikum wbt..

Ehem..... 

I have so many drafts now, but I must complete this one even though tomorrow another huge event is coming up ahah!

I have to update this, 10am, 11/12/13 ~~ What a beautiful date...... My heart was beating furiously, I kept praying for him... 

May Allah SWT make everything smooth and easy for him...

And Alhamdulillah..

He made it...

He always says, "I'm just a Kampung Boy...."

Well, this Kampung boy, who once knew not a single word in English, now made a speech in full and fluent English and he speaks Deutsch too!

This Kampung boy had just made his mother, his wife, children, brother, sisters, and professors so proud.

This Kampung boy, just proved that anything is possible if only we work hard to achieve our goal and believe in Allah SWT. 

This Kampung boy is now so far far away from his Kampung but, his heart is always always there... 

His dream to go back to his country to serve his people is now achievable...

He had just passed his PhD with flying colors!!

This Kampung boy..... who has always been so humble...

I'm so so so so so so so proud of you...

I can't even express my gratitude to Allah SWT. May He guide us through, always always......

                           
                    
                          And he was the King of the day too!!!

The best part was of course when they announced his success...

 I was close to tears...

The next best part was when hubby introduced me to his Professor and one of the thing he said about hubby was that he's so proud of him... 

Owwwwwhhhhh... I was touched...

The next next best thing was when the food was served.....

Because I prepared everything myself hehe

Of course with Hubby's help the previous day :)

The next next next best part was when Hubby announced that I cooked the meal, and they all clapped their hands for me!!

Oh my... it was sooooo Memorable.. 

I'll never ever forget those moments, ever insyaAllah :')

And the next next next next best part was when most of them seemed like they really enjoyed the meal, some even had a second round.

It was such an honor to serve them :)

And the next next next next next best part was when each came to me and thanked me and gave compliments about the food...

Well, yeah, they would definitely say that the food was delicious even when it's not that delicious, but I really appreciate the courtesy :)

And I felt.... honored.... and satisfied...

and... Thankful!!

Eh???

Well...... that's all for today...

I have too many stories which I don't know when will I ever have the time to share, but....

I'm currently really excited to go back to our home country, but at the same time, I'm also very very sad...

I put my trust in Allah... a 100% trust... for He knows what is best for us...

Life is too short, let's live it to the fullest...

And... 

To Dr. Ing Azmir Azhari,

The tittle doesn't matter to me, those efforts, determinations, positive attitudes, and your humbleness, that's what matters...

May this success bring us closer to Him.

Congratulations my dear Hubby, the Kampung Boy :)

He had turned 9 last wednesday...

6th November 2004, the day I'd for the first time experienced birth pain....

The day I swore I would never get pregnant again... Hehe

And now I have 3 kids hehehe..

Ok, ok, so it was Afeef's birthday last Wednesday, his 9th birthday!

Alhamdulillah!

And really, feels like yesterday that I'd given birth to him...

Mmmm.... Stop exagerating, maybe it doesn't really feel like yesterday, more like a few days ago, or maybe a few months ago, or a year ago, ok, to be exact, it feels like a few years ago, or let just be accurate, it feels like 9 years ago that I'd given birth to him..

And yes, it's been 9 years!!!

Ok, how do I describe him as my son...?

I think he's very sensitive, kind-hearted, obedient, caring, and...

Of course all mothers will say that about their child!

     

                      Well, he certainly is caring and a responsible brother too...

 Always takes good care of his two little sisters..

And they both love him so much! The only big brother for them!

And he is loved by his friends, especially his best friend Luan... (",)

Picnic together with 2 'penyibuk'

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... Warms the heart kan?

Solat sama-sama... :')

He is the Imam now to his sister, will be the Imam for the whole family one day insyaAllah :)

At Florian's birthday party last month (",)

And, he is super duper excited for this year's birthday because he will have all his favorite friends over, and they will catch a movie, a little game at home, cakes, presents etc etc...

We all stayed up late last Wednesday after a little celebration (papa bought a cake, eh why didn't I bake one? Eheh, I also don't know why hehe!!)

And we've prepared these invitation cards together, all on our own, from searching the best photos on internet, to printing, cutting, pasting etc etc)

Afeef was so excited that night and tonight was even more!

Because tomorrow is the big day for him!

So, tomorrow is the real celebration, I am so sleepy right now, but I just have to update this, because I was supposed to make an entry for his birthday last wednesday, but I just been a bit busy and I can't delay this anymore. 

So, to my Afeef:

My doa is always with you, and when you read this entry someday, know that you are one of the most precious, priceless gift I've ever had my whole life...

You complete Us! 

(",)